Rethinking what leadership looks like - and how HR can help

Should managers always have all the answers? Of course not. But many still feel like they should - and that expectation can hold them back from having the kind of open, honest conversations that truly support their teams. Debbie Kleiner has some suggestions about how HR can help to adapt management styles to fit the modern workplace.

In the modern workplace, employees aren't necessarily expecting their managers to offer therapy or even solutions. They do expect that their manager is someone they can talk to - someone who's approachable, emotionally aware and willing to listen. That level of human connection is no longer a "nice-to-have" - it's essential for wellbeing and engagement.

The rise of hybrid and remote working has introduced new challenges for communication and wellbeing. Employees can feel isolated or overlooked more easily - and managers can, consciously or not, become less available or less responsive.

Research backs this up. According to Gallagher's State of the Sector report, 69% of employees say their manager has more impact on their mental health than their doctor or therapist. That's a powerful insight. It tells us that line managers play a central role in shaping how people feel at work - and by extension, how well they perform. Yet, many managers are still avoiding these conversations.

Why do so many managers struggle to talk about mental health? There's no single reason, but fear plays a big role. Managers often worry about saying the wrong thing, not knowing how to respond if someone opens up, or accidentally crossing professional boundaries. Some fear being held accountable for something they're not trained to deal with. Others simply don't feel confident enough to begin the conversation.

The result? Silence. Avoidance. Unfortunately, that can do more harm than good. When managers don't engage, employees may interpret it as indifference - or worse, rejection. According to a CIPD report on mental health and wellbeing at work, most line managers still feel underprepared when it comes to managing mental health concerns within their teams. Many lack training, clear guidance or the space to practice these conversations in a safe environment. This is where HR has a critical role to play.

The weight of outdated expectations

Part of the issue lies in traditional views of what it means to be a "good manager". Historically, managers have been expected to be authoritative, in control and focused on delivering results above all else. While there's still a place for decisiveness and structure, that kind of leadership model leaves little room for vulnerability, emotional awareness or personal connection.

Being a vulnerable manager doesn't mean overstepping boundaries or oversharing. It means being honest about limitations, showing empathy and being willing to say, 'I don't have the answer, but I'm here to support you.'

But today's workplace is different. The rise of hybrid and remote working has introduced new challenges for communication and wellbeing. Employees can feel isolated or overlooked more easily - and managers can, consciously or not, become less available or less responsive.

We are starting to see a welcome shift towards more emotionally intelligent leadership. Being a vulnerable manager doesn't mean overstepping boundaries or oversharing. It means being honest about limitations, showing empathy and being willing to say, "I don't have the answer, but I'm here to support you."

What can HR do to make a difference?

If we want to change how managers approach mental health, we need to change how we train, support and evaluate them. And that's where HR and People teams come in.

First, organisations need to treat mental health as a core business issue, not a personal one. That means embedding it into management training, leadership development programmes and performance expectations. Managers shouldn't be left to guess what's expected of them when it comes to supporting wellbeing.

It also means making sure managers have access to the right tools and training. Mental Health First Aid (MHFA) training, for example, equips managers with the knowledge to recognise signs of poor mental health, listen without judgment and signpost to appropriate help. Yet uptake remains limited. According to research by Mind (UK), fewer than half of line managers feel they've received sufficient training in mental health support.

It's not just about formal training. Managers also need simple, practical resources - conversation guides, check-in frameworks and clear referral pathways. They should feel confident directing employees to internal support, whether that's an Employee Assistance Programme (EAP), occupational health services or signposted external charities such as Mind (UK), the Samaritans or Mental Health UK.

Many employees also don't know what support is available to them. HR should work to raise awareness across the business, ensuring employees understand what's on offer and how to access it without stigma or fear of judgment.

Redefining leadership for the contemporary workplace

Another key piece of this puzzle is reshaping how we define and reward good leadership. We can't keep promoting people based solely on technical skill or performance delivery, then expect them to suddenly be great people managers. Emotional intelligence, empathy and the ability to build psychological safety need to be seen as core leadership capabilities, not optional extras.

It's worth asking: do your competency frameworks include expectations around wellbeing support? Do your manager appraisals assess emotional intelligence and team care? If not, there's an opportunity to make those expectations visible and measurable.

From avoidance to action

Managers don't need to have all the answers. But they do need to show up. And HR can help them do that - not by expecting them to solve every issue, but by empowering them to listen, respond appropriately and direct people to the right support. Professor Sir Cary Cooper CBE, ex-CIPD chair, once said at a MAD World Summit that all managers should have empathy. Those responsible for future manager promotion and recruitment should heed these words and existing managers should be brought up to speed with what is expected of them. Mental health isn't just a wellbeing issue, it's a performance, retention and culture issue. When we equip managers to have better conversations, we help create a workplace where people feel safe, supported and able to bring their whole selves to work.

The shift won't happen overnight. But it starts with HR leading the way by providing training, setting expectations and modelling openness from the top down.